We've all been faced with different levels or instances of changes. Whether it is the beginning or the end of a relationship, a move, a loss, an unexpected event, or maybe even a planned one that you reluctantly accepted. The bottom line is that we all know that change is the only constant and no matter how hard we try to fight it; it is going to be there.
I think there are times when if we open a new door without hesitation that we can be faced with wonderful changes that tend to end up being more of a positive than a negative. Not to say that they are not still uncomfortable, but they are maybe not the worst like we first expected. Take moving for example... some people are forced to move out of their preferred place of residence be it to move in with partner, for a job, financial reasons, whatever the case may be. When most of us think about moving away from the place we're used to (and most likely love) we probably think "No way! I love it here" "All my friends and family are here!" "Why would I want to live in the city when living in the country is SO much better?" "OMG I am not going to be a suburban soccer mom with a minivan!"
(Ok so maybe that last one was more specifically what I would say... haha!)
But more times than not - no matter what preferred hesitation statement you choose - relationship trumps location, money trumps ideals, and since a job is what makes you that money... career trumps pretty much most of your options.
So how do you weigh things out to make sure that your happiness isn't trumped?
My only real thoughts here is a good ol' fashion dose of: look on the bright side! A Pro/Con list may help...although beware of the fact that you may end up with more Cons for the time being than Pros. The ultimate goal here is to not necessarily be 100% Pro, but it is to open your mind to being a little bit more Pro. One step at a time. The more you sit and relish in all your Cons you will never get the chance to experience what Good Change feels like. It does exist! And it's pretty wonderful!!
If there are areas that you're struggling with right now, I challenge you to come up with a plan about how you are going to seek out positive change.
My recent personal example would be after struggling with career growth dissatisfaction for the last few years, I needed to abandon my hopes & dreams of continuing in the sports marketing industry. This wasn't an easy decision whatsoever. But essentially I had worked myself to a "moo point" (as Joey would say on FRIENDS) and then just felt stuck. This dissatisfaction was affecting me in several different ways, until I finally decided that just as I felt I was "meant to" work in sports, there may be another spot out there that I am more suited for right now. I threw caution to the job search wind finally landing myself in ...... the PET industry! So turns out; there IS a bright side. Leaving sports & the company I have been part of for many years behind wasn't a positive experience, but the end result of becoming a Manager; finally climbing onto the platform I've been lounging for, is a feeling of satisfaction that outweighs the negatives of all the goodbyes.
This coincides with the fact that good change probably just doesn't come out of no where. You need to make things happen for yourself. If you're unhappy, you can't sit around being unhappy & expecting to wake up one day just glowing with happiness. Hmm, sorry... it doesn't work that way. Be proactive! If you want a relationship; don't sit around on the couch watching Ben pick Courtney wondering if CTV has even looked at your submission for the Bachelor Canada. Go to a Marlies game and plop yourself in front of a group of guys! If you want a new job; apply to at least 5 a day. Make your LinkedIn profile, get yourself to networking events, create a portfolio, send e-mails, make phone calls! If you want something new but can't afford it; go through your old clothes, books, furniture, electronics, put whatever you don't use up on Kijiji! (I know "its weird", but people buy that stuff...) And start a piggy bank that contributes solely to the purchase of that vacation, pair of boots, pair of breasts, whatever it is you are looking for! If you want good karma; Volunteer!! Buy the person behind you in line their coffee, send a text message to 10 people on your contact list that you haven't spoke to in a while and say, "Hey! Hope you're doing really well... just wanted you to know I am thinking of you."
It is crazy how many of these small little changes in your habits & mindset can really be a great thing - and the results can be even better.